When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Randomize
