I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
