have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
