K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
