I don't think brook has ever known best
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
