I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
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