That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
