So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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