Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
Randomize
