YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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