i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Randomize
