She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize
