Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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