RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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