How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
im six kinds of drunk right now
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
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