No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
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