Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
she woke up with a sticky ear
Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
