How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
