My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
