The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
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