Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
