College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Randomize
