We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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