It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
