There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize
