please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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