what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Semen is not good for contacts.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
