she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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