Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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