So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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