my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
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