8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
I accidentally peed all over the couch. It's safe to say I'm not welcome at that house anymore
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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