the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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