"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
