OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
Randomize
