Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Randomize
