its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
