Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
