I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Yes but from my experience being high around your own baby makes you feel like the worst kind of mom
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
