We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
Randomize