I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
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