Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
