I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
The air was thick with penises
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
