YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Watching a guy pay his tab with a check. Jesus dude...
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
Randomize
