sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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