i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I was actually kinda bummed my STD test came back negative.
That would have been proof he'd slept with the stripper. Lame.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Randomize
