he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
