Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
