My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
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