dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Randomize
