I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
i make up for being a shitty girlfriend by being amazing in bed.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
