It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
