A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
I told you in the isle if you get the one that vibrates that I masturbating with it. Your fault.
Bullshit. You owe me a toothbrush.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Randomize
